Friday, January 28, 2011

Christian Goth and C.Goth Friendly Music

This was a great request from ETERNITY KIDZ.  So here it is, Christian Goth and C.G. Friendly music.  I decided to add Christian goth friendly music because there are some good bands out there that I myself do enjoy and I think others will too.  After all, goths don't just listen to just goth music non-stop, right?  Right!

Note: I will not say Christian at the beginning of every band but instead let you now that all of the following bands are Christian.

Christian Goth bands:
Saviour Machine is a progressive gothic band that has also been labeled metal by Wikipedia.  They got there name from David Bowie's album The Man Who Sold The World.  The lyrical content covers themes from Revelation, war and death and also personal introspection. 
BATZZ in the Belfry  are a darkwave electro band.  They started in 2003 in the tradition of old-school gothic rock.  Their latest ablum is Glow in the Dark released in 2007.
Ending The Vicious Cycle  are a post-punk darkwave band formed in 2009.  Their are influenced by bands such as The Cure, Bauhaus, Siouxie and the Banshees and Echo and the Bunnyman.  Their lyrics are introspective with melodic guitar lines and a classic 80's synth sound.
Reverend Leviathan has been programing/song writing since 2007, his music is more of goth electro.  His debut album, Eden's Graveyard, was released in 2008.  Voltaire stated - ". . . I think it's the only actual goth CD I've gotten in years. . . Keep up the good work!"
Dead Artist Syndrome is a gothic rock band formed in 1990.  Brian Healy was labeled "father of Christian goth" by Rozz Williams from Christian Death and Shadow Project. 
Beauty For Ashes is a gothic alternative band.  You can go to to listen.

Midnight Syndicate is a dark ambient band and are not Christian, and if you want to check them out you can read about them at   Personally I rather like them.

Punk bands:
The Last Hope are a hardcore punk band (also considered streetpunk).  They are influenced by late 70's punk and 80's rock n' roll and themes in their lyrics are usually common to horror punk. 
Grave Robber are a horror punk (rock) band.  Everything they stand for is no without symbalism, like the name, which refers to Jesus return.  They also where brown costums and zombie/skull masks.
FBS (Fight Before Surrender) is a hardworking punk band from San Antonio, TX (U.S.) formed in 2003.  Some of the band that have influenced them are Motorhead, GHB and The Exploited.  And like many in not all of the bands mentioned above they can be found on
Children 18:3 are a punk rock band, whose members are David, Lee Marie and Seth, homeschooling sibling (I found this interesting).  Their name comes from a verse in the Bible, Matthew 18:3.  They originally formed in 1999.

Alternative Rock bands:
The Becoming (also known as We Are The Becoming) are a rock band with dark feeling of insturmental sound (and maybe a sound of pop).   Not too long back they toured with 69 Eyes and Dommin.  They are also in the prosses of changing their name.
Red are a hard rock (alternative) band established in 2004.  Their first single "Breathe Into Me" hit number 15 on the U.S. Mainstream Rock chart (and their a Christian band!).  (In fact I have their Innocence & Instinct CD and love it!)
Skillet is a rang from alternative metal and hard rock along with others.  Collide and Comatose are probably the most well known albums, along with their newest on Awake.  They officially started in 1996. 
Showbread is a band with no specific genre, or as they call it, "raw rock".  The band's name comes from biblical reference, that Jesus taught new Christians, it's not about rules but about love.  In fact the band's purpose was to be fit to play Sunday mornings at the Southern Baptist church they attended, but when the began to play "goth punk" music their church told them to spot playing that kind of music.  Their lyrics are often introspective and inspire different interpretations to listeners.  The have mistakening been labeled emo or screamo.
Nine Lashes are an experimental rock band and are brought together under one Name their hearts break for this world that is dying.  Their name comes from "Cat of Nine Tails" that was an instrument thought to have been used on Christ before the cross. 

Also here are a couple of bands I almost left out.
Vexing Souls are a metal band with strong gothic influence (or gothic metal). 
Demon Hunter is a hardcore metal band.

Also there are a lot more metal bands and I can asure you there are more of each of the genres I have covered (especially in alternative rock).  But these are the ones that I know of.  You can get out because I know they mention a lot more bands, covering more in metal also.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

I am Happy to Present. . .

Another Versatile Blogger Award from Outcast146 at Outcast of Adam Rd.  Thank you so so much, your too kind!

  1. Thank and link to the person who gave this award.
  2. Answer 10 questions.
  3. Pass it to 7 other blogs you love or have recently discovered.
  4. Leave a note to the blogs you have tagged telling them about it.
I won't be answering the questions since I have before and nothing has changed.

And all the blogs I want to award have already been tagged by me or Amy (Ultimate Goth Guide).
But the ones I would award would be ETERNITY KIDZ, If Only I Were a Goth, Clockwork Mice and Toy Spiders, and the ones I already tagged before.  I have enjoyed reading your guys' blogs very much! 

Angel of Darkness

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Hello All!

As you can see I have changed my layout.  I liked the other one but this looks way better and everything fits better. 
I am surprised at how my much I have been on here with being so busy and all.  And My next post will be another Versatile Blogger Award.  Yes another!  And then maybe a bit of fiction. . .

I love the comments I get!  And yes I am very happy I now have 5 followers, even though the blogs I follow have way more!

And yes, here is another picture!  I love these pictures!

Angel of Darkness

Listening to: FM Static - Girl fo the Year

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Um, 15 Random Facts?

I have been kind of lazy, but I have been tagged by Amy at Goth Guide with this 15 radom facts thing, shoudl be fun!  Sorry it took so long.  School, school, school!  Okay. . .so here are the fifteen radom facts about me.  Oh, and I have to tag 5 other people.

1.  I get nerves way too often.  Especially when I am going somewhere alone.
2.  I really want to get a purple mohawk even though everyoen thinks it's more of a boys thing to have a mohawk.
3.  I have been writing a story for three years and am still working on it.  I can't say why it is taking so long but I do know that I hope to be done by next year.
4.  I have a wacko goofy cat that I love very very much.  His name is Mittens, he's gray on top and white underneathe.  I sware he gets the devil in him at night because he goes absolutely crazy and overly hiper, and gets a whild look in his eyes.  Love that  cat.
5.  I am on the tech team at my church on Wednesdays (for youth group or Rift) and I do the lights.
6.  I actually do somewhat like vampires, as long as it has nothing to do with Twilight or sparkling vampires, that's just creepy.  My friends calls that Edward dude "twinkle teeth".
7.  We had a plastic skeleton that you hang on the door and even when it was not Halloween I would dress it up and act like he was my best friend, take him everywhere (him or her I can't say. . .) and he would keep the other bad monsters down in the basemeant away.  (I was five.)
8.  I love to watch the Twilight Zone when ever it is on.  First watched it when I was 13, a marathon was on.
9.  I love the show (I think it's manga) Avatar: The Last Airbender.  Been hooked since I first saw it in 2005 when it started (did it start in 200 or 2006?).
10.  I have lived in 4 different states, but born in Montana and is home.  Glad we came back.  I lived in Arizona, Wyoming, and Oregon.
11.  I have only ever stepped into Hot Topic once, this summer with a friend who had never been there herself.  I don't not like it and don't like.
12.  If you didn't already know I am, yes, a Tim Burton freak.  And there even beter with Johnny Depp in them.
13.  I can be shy and timid a lot and can't stand it!  Never used to be like that.
14.  I own over a dozen crosses (in jewelry, mostly).
15.  I generally like all kinds of music, whatever appeals to me.  I don't really like metal and can't stand rap or hip-hop.  But there is a metal band I like (Demon Hunter) and there is a couple of songs from a Christian hip-hop raper (Manafest) that I like (the songs Avalanche and No Plan B).  But more so listen to pop-punk, alternative, rock, post-punk, New Wave, punk rock, electro, synthpop. . . etc.

I'll tag:

And well I don't know who else?

Thursday, January 20, 2011

What Are You Waiting For? The End of the World?

You've been trying to get me open
Caught out in the open
Everyone is hoping you'd give
Anything to take this
Everything that breaks this
Everyone is faceless
Give me
Something to believe in
Quick or else I'm leaving
Need a better reason
I know
Things get complicated
So miseducated
It's a wonder that we made it

Under speculation
What are we facing
Too much complications
Looking for a name
In a new generation
A new focus new destination

I don't wanna look
I just wanna find
Can you give me something to believe in
Keep your religion, don't need your lies
I'm just looking for one good reason
Feel like it's teenage hunting season
But nothing out there sounds half decent
Who's out there? Who's gonna save us?
Before we all fall through the cracks in the pavement 

You' ve been trying to get me open
Caught out in the open
Everyone is hoping
Give me
Something to believe in
Quick or else I'm leaving
Need a better reason
I know

I'm never going to fall in line
So don't even bother wasting your time
I'm a bread of a different kind
Sent back just to invade your mind

[Last part of song]
And if you don't know what I'm talking about
It's probably better cause I'm working it out
Don't want to spent my lifetime figurin out
That I could've just said one prayer

And if you know what I'm talking about
Then together where both working it out
Don't wanna spent my lifetime figurin out
I missed the point now it's over. . .
I missed the point now it's over. . .

Song by FM Static called Something To Believe In from their album What Are You Waiting For?

I first remember hearing that song whe I was just turned twelve back in 2007, on Air1 (Christian alternative radio station).  I loved that song and still do.  It's almost like my life song you could say.  I feel great listening to it, like I can do anything.  Music is personal to me, and something deep, I love listening to music.

You know, I am a bread of a different kind! 

Last night at Rift (the youth group I go to) was a question in small group.  How do you want people to perseve you?  I thought about it and this song came to me and my answer along with, from the heart!  I said the pure truth: I want people to see I am different, do not fit in a box!  Jesus doesn't fit into a box and never has, ever!  He didn't even come into the world like the Jews thought He would and He was the most different person ever, and He didn't sin!  He even talked to gentiles who the Jews thought unclean, and He was unpredictable.  He just doesn't fit into a box. 
I don't want to fit in a box.  I want to be all over outside it! 

Different.  Well, there's nothing wrong with it at all.  After all God made all of us individually, no one like another, none the same.  So why is it that we feel we must all try to be as similar as possible?  They say fashion is all about individuality, right?  What's wrong with being different then?  And I don't just mean on the outside but on the inside.  So different that you fit into no one catagory but many many, and even ones that don't exist.  The answer is there is nothing wrong with it, at all. 

In fact when I was trying to "fit in" I was losing myself and flet more invisible than before, just on of the crowd.  Normal. (cringe)  But being myself feels great.  And by being myself I find that I get closer to God because He is where my true identity is, the one who made me, well me. 

So that's my goal, to be different, not fit into any boxes.  Who wants to fit into a box?!!!?

Depression, I hate that word!  Happy, joyful, peaceful, yeah I like those words!

Would you rather have a best friend whose a ghost or skeleton?
(I pick skeleton!)

Listening to: FM Static - Something To Believe In, and now FM Static - Definintely Maybe

Angel of Darkness

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Goth and Me. . .

Okay, so this is an inspired post from reading MissGracie's (Goth in College) and Amy's (The Ultimate Goth Guide) posts. 

I never really went throught that whole mallgoth thing (on the outside anyway, how I dressed) because I was afriad of being called a poser and getting into something I didn't really even know about so I spent almost a year checking out what goth truely was.  You could say I looked it inside out, even though I doubt that's possible(?).  But I did think like others that you had to wear all black all the time, listen to Evanescence, etc.

I have been a Christian since I was at least six years old, but have messed up my walk with Jesus many a time.  I have always felt like I was somehow on the outside.  My style of clothes was tomboyish, wearing non-fitting t-shirts and capris, sometime cargo, and I didn't really care what I wore just as long as it matched, and to this day I still dress modestly, refusing to wear shorts or low cut tops or anything girly.  I have also had this tendancy to be kind of rebellious, and be different from others.  So maybe it was a good thing I saw so many Christians not doing what the Bible taught because that made me want to do it even more so, in fact to this day I feel even like I don't fit in with other Christians sometimes.  But if it was just like what everyone else was doing, if I didn't like it I would do the opposite, or close to it.  A bread of a different kind!

I had friends that would tell me stuff like black was evil or those kids that dress like that are freaks and touble.  I was always very interested in things different or people who dressed dark, or goth.  And when I saw kids like that I thought to myself that I liked it a lot no matter how much someone told me it was bad.

I went through my time of trying to fit in, and I hated it!  I didn't feel good wearing clothes I saw so many other girls wear.  Everyone else seemed to like it, but me of course.  I started looking up goth when I was thirteen and fourteen and found it to my liking.  It was dark which I liked and, different!  I was afriad some of my more prepy Christian friends would stop liking me, but that hasn't exactly happened.  I didn't get looked at funny going to church in my black capris, and black shirt with a white cross, but I did when I wore my light teal shirt with a skull on it, which even now I think is weird (not the shirt!).

My parents didn't even seem to care that my style (know that I knew about goth for real) was growing darker with more black clothes.  And even know they don't care.

Yeah, that's me at my fifteenth b-day.  My friend told me
with the candles on my cake it looked like a graveyard., LoL!

Some of my friends don't consider me goth, and some people think I am because I wear a chokar here and there and wear black sometimes.  But none of my friends are goth, just interested in it, have there own dark look, or own look period.

There I am again.  You can barly see the purple extentions.

And there was a question MissGracie asked on her blog about how your look will change as you get older.  I think mine will definitely change and become more extreme and better, right now I'm still trying to find waht suits me with all the different styles of goth and what truely fits me. 

Listening to: Bauhaus - Who Killed Mr. Moonlight (my favorite song!)

I did not become goth because it was always there, but the difference from then and now is that I let it shine.  Like I said, it was always there.

(If this bored you I am so not sorry, it felt good to let this out somehow.)

Angel of Darkness

Friday, January 14, 2011

New Blog Title

This is a short post, but I thought I'd change the title of my blog because it makes more sense calling it that.

You know honestly I think this blog might help me out mentaly, because I am constantly thinking, non-stop, and I have to wonder if I go mad sometimes.  Writing is something I do because I have to, it's just me being me you could say.  And I'm happy to say, I have not been avoiding writing my story, not worrying over how it will turn out or what I messed up on.

I have been stuck on listening to Ocean Floor by Audio Adrenaline (Christian band, perhaps the best), and it amazes me how much this song reflects how I have feeling.  See I have a very hard time forgiving myself for even the simplest little things.  I need to be reminded that I am forgiven and do not need to feel this weight anymore.

Angel of Darkness
(Can you guess what I am listening to?)

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Versatile Blogger Award, For Me!

Wow, so I have been awarded!  That makes me happy, and I thank very much Amy at The Ultimate Goth Guide for giving it to me.

  1. Thank and link back to the person who gave the award.
  2. Answer 10 question.
  3. Pass it to 7 other blogs you enjoy or have resently discovered.
  4. Then leave a note to the blogs you awarded telling them about it.
The 10 Questions:

Why did you create this blog?
I really have no specific reason.  I thought it might be fun and I enjoy writing.  I feel bad it's no deeper than that, but it's the turth.

What kind of blogs do you follow?
Let's see. . . blogs on goth subculture, or one that interests me, like someone's life or interesting views or comments on certian things.

Favorite make-up brand?
Well, actually I don't wear make-up so there is no favorite brand, yet.

Favorite clothing brand?
Well, I seem to like Tripp, Living Dead Souls and Criminal Damage, as I am attracted to the clothes more than other brands, but I can't choose!

Indispensible make-up product?
I wouldn't know.

Favorite color?
Absolutely purple! =D

Favorite perfume?
You know, I don't wear perfume.

Favorite film?
Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland! Beautiful!

What country would you like to visit and why?
I think England.  The history of it and the fact that many of Edgar Allan Poe's writings were inspired by his time lived there.

Would you rather forget to put mascara on one eye or forget blush on one side of you face?
Even though I wear no make-up I would say blush.

Blogs I Award:
(It can't be 7 because I know only 5)

I have enjoyed reading her blog very much.

Amy at Ultimate Goth Guide
I have very much enjoyed reading her blog for quite awhile now and think she deserves another award!  And I love the pictures.

I have, again, very much enjoyed reading her blog and seeing the lovely pictures.  And I think she already got this award too but all well!

I did my best, at least it's three.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011


I can't promise I will be on here much these next couple of weeks, school has me jamed!  But I will try to post one tomorrow.  I will be up late tonight doing school thta needs to get done so maybe I will try for midnight. 

My mood is excited!

Listening to: Disciple - Dear X (You Don't Own Me)

I was addicted to Into The Light by Siouxie and the Banshees, now this (the song I'm listening to now)!

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Being Christian is About Being an Outsider

Christianity is not a religion like most people think.  Religion is a bunch of rules and regulations that one follows.  Christianity is faith, something you choose to believe in and there are no rules or regulations.

Now, I mentioned some of this earlier, but not like now.

Well, being a Christian is all about being an outcast in the world right?  (Yes)  And that means not fitting in with the rest of society, being different, standing out because we follow a crazy idea that there is a Jesus and he died for us. . . But you know that.  I hear it preached about at church, to be different.  In fact there is a particular verse I would like to share with you: Romans 12:2 (NLT) "Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think."

Society has an idea of how we must think and act (that "cookie cutter model") that I disagree with personally, I mean, not everyone can fit it, there is free will and not everyone likes all society has to offer in that "Package" of how we must be.

Okay, so then why am I and many others who are turely different inside and out not liked by other Christians.  Why is there a "cookie cutter model" for Christians when we come in so many differences meant to do different things for different purposes, etc.  I call that hypocrisy!  I don't dress like a Christian should, well how then is a Crhistian supposed to dress (besides modest which in fact I do)?  What does it matter if someone wears two different socks or has red hair or is a black-clad darkling, I'm pretty sure God doesn't care.

Say someone walks into a church.  Their dresses in combat boots, fishnet, and a trench coat with red, pruple and black hair, and let's say a few piercings.  This person was looking for a place where they could be accepted and wanted to check out Christianity.  But when this person walks into the church on a Sunday morning and everyone stares, looks away in disgust, eyes evily, or when (this person: Raven) goes to say hi how are you they turn away coldly.  No one sits by Raven and then suddenly is asked to leave, she decides that Christians are all fakes, and never comes back, and that church was not the only one.  Although there have been a few people who have been good to her.

I must ask why?  I really can't understand. 

Nothing like that has happened to me, but at my own church I have gotten thoughs stares I get everywhere else.  At youth group a lot of the kids that good there won't talk to me (prepy ones usually).  I have hear things say more than once at church or other Christian events (Aquire the Fire) that people like me (goth, emo, alternatives) are oh so lost and need help and don't know who we are or that we're all so deppressed and need to be led to Chirst.  Gee, if there are black-clad people out there that are lost and don't know Christ it can't possibly be that Christians are being judgemental. 

And also, just because someone dresses like that doesn't mean they're all lost and depressed.  There's me and some of my friends.  The way you dress does not determine what's on the inside (usually; most of the time).  And a downside, I'm an outsider in the world and in the Christian communitty.  Upside, God loves the freaks in black nail polish. =)  In fact He loves all of us freaks, because we really aren't like the rest of the world and it's "cookie cutter model".

I had to get that out!  I feel better now. 

The world threw me out because I was different, couldn't ever fit in, and didn't want to, so God took me in.  He took in an outcast, outsider, freak, someone society didn't and still doesn't want.  I am lucky.

I hope everyone is having a great day!

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Do You Ever Day Dream?

I am told I think too much, and that is very ture, I do.  I day dream all of the time.  I get lost in my head all the time.  I love it when I get lost in a book or in my story I am writing.  I get lost in my imagination all too much.  I have been told I am quiet for it, maybe even shy.  But I'm not, I'm just lost. . . Either in another world or in this one with who I am.  I wonder a lot too, just wonder what things might be like if I were like this or that or about what my future will hopefully look like and about the beauty of Heaven, my ture home that I have never seen, the place, ture place, I belong away from this world (although this one isn't all that often). 

If someone where to ask me why I don't have a boyfriend (never have either) I ca only answer that, if I don't know who I am than how can I expect someone else to love me and know me for me, I don't even know who that is!  And at this age, what's the point?  I have me whole life a head of me, a life I want to live and not care about having a boyfriend till God brings someone along.  But I won't even know because first we will be the best of friends, very close.  And if no one comes along, I'm fine with it, being a virgin I mean.  I just want to love my life the bast I can, even when the world is crashing down on my, like it has been these last few months.

Do you ever wonder what it would be like to be invisible?  I do.  Not for ever but just when you want to.  To be able to go around with no one knowing your listening to them, watching them, or just doing whatever and saying whatever. 

It seems like the time when I am most awak is at night, past ten.  I love the night, it's beautiful with the stars and the moon, and the darkness, and the peace and the quiet of it.  At night I can't see the world in all it's beauty, and feel calm, or I can't stop my thoughts, good or bad or sad.  I love looking up into the night sky and seeing a smile.  It's funny, I used to be scared of the dark but never the night its self.  I used to dream of wondering in the night mysteriously when I was really young, and even now. 

I've always been different from everyone else, but when you read what I just wrote am I really all that different?  Except that yes, I find beauty in the darkest places and love to read Edgar Allan Poe, which almost every one I ask thinks he is dark so the don't like him, but that's why I do! (HeHeHe!)  But I love being a little different from others, not fitting in.  To fit in is to blend in, but to be different is to stand out and been seen. 

In some ways I feel like my character, Ned Dickson.  Quiet, different and just not too concerned about what others think of how you dress or think, but maybe more in what you do.  And wanting to go to a place where no one is around, the world and society gone, but life everywhere.

To lie in the grass and stare at the sky.  To walk through a forest and find your way to a field over looking the world, to walk the sunset and the stars come out to great you.  To sit on a rock and watch the creek run by with a great view of mountian over head.  And I remember this one place when me and my family where moving from Wyoming and went through Billings on are way to Portland Oregon, we were going through the Rockys and came to this every small little town and staying in a motel that sat right of the river's edge with the mountian on either side (being in them) and watching the sunset.  Montana is beautiful, and I always find myself day dreaming, lost in the beauty.

I dream of one day being an author, writing my fiction, and about being a great artist and even photographer.  I dream about what it would be like to not give a hoot about what people think of me, to just live my life I was given in the first place!  I dream about the day when I do find myself married with a family.

Do you ever day dream?

Listening to: FM Static - Crazy Mary   (I feel like her sometimes.)