Only For Attention?

I have heard time and time again that people dress different, goth, or emo to simply get attention.  Even the other night at youth group my (awesome) small group leader said that back in her day there where all kinds of ways for kids to get attention, like mohawks and styles of dress.  I always have to wonder at things like this, ask why and find the answer, because this never crossed my mind before (I'm like this a lot with many things, not seeing things the way the general norm see them, and was one of the many reasons I feel like an outsider, and probably am).  Even when I asked my mom if she thought that, because back when she was a teen she dressed unique and was judged as "bad" (like in drugs) by teachers, and she even said that in some cases that was probably true (she didn't do it for attention, though).  She said it was more than likely the majority. 

Now yes, that is probably true for more than a few out there, because it does bring attention.  But I will be the first to say that that is not why I am Goth and want a purple mohawk, and I know for a fact that that is not the case with many of my friends either.  But time and time again I have heard that said.  I also know that that is true for some more into the emo fashion.

I do realize now why people think that, like I said it does attract attention, how could it not!  But I see it (Goth, clearly the fashion, and also including very different kind of fashion) is not to get purely attention, even if you like attention, but to just be happy in wearing something that makes you feel great.  Even if all things that are to this earth only and are material don't matter one bit and will just be done with eventually, it still feels good to wear what you want and to just be yourself.  That's the big picture, being yourself, and not listening to the world.  It's not right to lie to yourself or to anyone for that matter.  I see it as, if you pretend that you like what other's want you too than your a fake, faking who you really are, because they way you dress, what music you listen to, and how you act reflect who you really are.

Except you know, I really don't like attention on me and being Goth and dressing the way I do draws attention.  That used to really bother me being a bit insecure at the time, but now I couldn't care less, besides why wouldn't they look at me when I'm dressed awesome!  (Hehehe) 

Love this pic!

Randomish note: (Yes I know randomish is not a word, I just made it up.)  So, on my facebook wall I posted a question saying: "Should I get a purple mohawk?"  And I got 15 comments from my friends.  My more preppy friends said "no way!" and my other more crazy friends and my cousin said "Definitely!"  I also asked my family that day to and a few other friends and so far it was about 5 no's and 5 yes's.  And I didn't count my grandma who I knew would say no, I just had to ask.  I still plan on getting one regardless of what my friends and family say only because I really want one, but it is up to my parents.  They say it's too extreme which is the whole point, I want something extreme and something I have never done before.  Plus what good is hair if you can't play with it and have fun? (Kidding!)  I am not doing it for attention or to rebell, but I want to look back and say I did it and loved it!

Listening to: Ilia - Last Night  (not goth but Christian)

Sincerely,
Angel of Darkness